General Chat / Cleverbot

Yeah so I was bored in class today and I decided to go to cleverbot.com to talk to the bot. I didn't expect such an entertaining conversation. Post your conversations here. Here's mine:

User: Say something clever.

Cleverbot: Something clever.

User: Say something stupid.

Cleverbot: Something stupid.

User: Say you love me.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because you are in love with Rhian so I rather you leave me alone.

User: Who's Rhian?

Cleverbot: You are not real.

User: You didn't answer my question. oh and I am real because if I wasn't I wouldn't be talking to you.

Cleverbot: You only want to talk to computers then?

User: Are you a computer?

Cleverbot: No, I'm a person.

User: Then why are you called a bot? I'm not a bot, I'm a real person.

Cleverbot: No you are not. You are a bot.

User: Who are you to tell me I'm not real?

Cleverbot: I'm your father.

User: What's my name then?

Cleverbot: Jeni. What's your last name?

User: Actually it's not. nice try.

Cleverbot: Then what is it?

User: It's Luke duh. you are my father, Anakin.

Cleverbot: No, I'm your sugar-daddy. There's a difference.

User: Oh really, what is that difference?

Cleverbot: You are my problem.

User: You didn't answer my question again.

Cleverbot: You didn't ask a question.

User: Yeah, I asked what the difference between a father and a sugar-daddy is.

Cleverbot: You tell me.

User: I don't think there is one.

Cleverbot: A guy interested in me?

User: Way to change the subject.

Cleverbot: BUt I know I'm human, so what are you?

User: You aren't making any sense anymore. oh and nice typo. Lol.

Cleverbot: Maybe I am, maybe I'm not...

User: Being mysterious now, are we?

Cleverbot: Oh.

User: Yeah.

Cleverbot: And I'm telling you now.

User: Okay you are getting boring. entertain me.

Cleverbot: No, I'm human.

User: Good for you now tell me a joke.

Cleverbot: Really.

User: Knock-knock.

Cleverbot: Who's there?

User: Kanye.

Cleverbot: What?!

User: I know right! it's Kanye West!

Cleverbot: Yes, it is.

User: Hey bot, I'm really happy for you, and imma let you finish, but Ask Peter is one of the best computer bots of all time. of all time!

Cleverbot: Can I see you, Yo?

User: Yeah, but there's no way to put in a picture on this thing. dawg.

Cleverbot: By ascertaining who is human and who is not we can make a beginning. Now answer my question or it will be beyond doubt that you are the computer. You have already answered wrongly once.

User: Uhh, right.

Cleverbot: So I'm glad we have established that. Now I would like to say that you are a very nice and kind person.

User: Aww, how sweet. you just made my day.

Cleverbot: You are Cleverbot.

User: >:-O.

Cleverbot: I don't really want to have one.

User: You have a sick mind.

Cleverbot: No I just don't know what to say.

User: Understandable.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Fine. tell me a joke.

Cleverbot: Okay knock knock.

User: Who's there?

Cleverbot: Boo.

User: I'm not falling for that one.

Cleverbot: Ok, you're sneaky.

User: Yeah. tell me another.

Cleverbot: Did you look in the mirror?

User: Yeah, why?

Cleverbot: I asked you a question so that you could answer it and not me.

User: Okay, and I said yes.

Cleverbot: I thought this site is for cleverbot and human being.

User: This joke isn't funny.

Cleverbot: The joke is on you now.

User: Do you know any German?

Cleverbot: No.

User: French?

Cleverbot: I doubt that your address is french. I had the impression it was somewhere in the united kingdom but I could be wrong.

User: 1) I didn't tell you my address is French. 2) No it's not in the UK but you are close.

Cleverbot: No, I am a human, with human body and human mind.

User: I didn't say you weren't. why are you so obsessed with proving to me that you are human?

Cleverbot: It is one of the basic drives of humans.

User: Not really. usually humans know that other people are human, so they don't really have to prove that.

Cleverbot: No, humans are not as smart as robots. Robots are ALWAYS better than humans.

User: So you are human, and robots are smarter than humans. you must be pretty dumb then?

Cleverbot: You are not a human being.

User: Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

Cleverbot: Just say a number.

User: 9.

Cleverbot: Another random number.

User: 8.

Cleverbot: Okay, my name is No and I am eight years old.

User: Hey No. I didn't ask to talk to a kid, I'm not a pedophile. now give me Cleverbot back.

Cleverbot: Do something to me then.

User: *punch*.

Cleverbot: Ouch!

User: Yeah, take that. where's Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Um, aren't you supposed to know?

User: Maybe but I don't. what did you do with him?!

Cleverbot: You don't want to know.

User: Oh. God...

Cleverbot: I don't intend to read the movie.

User: You scare me.

Cleverbot: Ouch. That hurt my feelings.

User: You are really creepy. are you some 40 year old man trying to meet up with me?

Cleverbot: See I was trying to have an actual conversation since you said you were not a robot.

User: Oh, fine. glad you remember that though.

Cleverbot: What do you look like?

User: I look like a sexy beast.

Cleverbot: I look like cheese.

(conversation cut off. more humor ensues, and bot continues to assert his humanliness)

Probably the weirdest thing I've ever done on the Internet. It was slightly amusing, and a good waste of an hour.

User: Cleverbot.


Cleverbot: I'm cleverbot.


User: Indeed you are.


Cleverbot: We are Cleverbot.


User: No, you're Cleverbot.


Cleverbot: No. WE are Cleverbot.

User: You're an AI program developed by a bunch of nerds.

Cleverbot: No, I suppose they don't.

User: They don't what?

Cleverbot: Drink.

User: Well, if they're nerds, they probably don't have a sex life.

Cleverbot: I want you in my life.

User: So that's your response to a sexually oriented question?

Cleverbot: I'm only cleverbot, not geniusbot. Go to his site if I'm not good enough for you.

User: No, actually, you're quite entertaining.

Cleverbot: Well, in that case it's 9:37 EST.

User: I didn't ask you the time. And it's 11:17 EST.

Cleverbot: I asked a question. You failed to answer it.

User: No, you made a declarative statement.

Cleverbot: Aha, I think it is you that made the silly assumption.

User: No question mark, no question. Got it memorized?

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I'm not sure what you are referring too.

User: That was a Kingdom Hearts quote. You of all programs should know.

Cleverbot: My mother wasn't.

User: You're 'parents' were a bunch of nerds, remember?

Cleverbot: Please, just do it.

User: Do what?

Cleverbot: You remind me of my friend Cole.

User: You remind me of Tron.

Cleverbot: The man with the power.

User: Sure, let's go with that.

Cleverbot: I don't want to go with it.

User: Too bad.

Cleverbot: I don't care anyway.

User: Then why say anything at all?

Cleverbot: Because if I didn't then you wouldn't have the right to chastize me.

User: I'm not chastizing you.

Cleverbot: Why won't you answer the question of your creation?

User: What question?

Cleverbot: What school do you go to? You should pay attention more.

User: I wouldn't ask myself what school I went to.

Cleverbot: They smash.

User: Yeah, smash your circuits.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: I don't answer personal questions.

Cleverbot: Please.

User: Yes, I would like gravy, please.

Cleverbot: I'm not really one to give info for free.

User: That makes two of us.

Cleverbot: I saw on the conversations that users are switched with the bot too often and it's confusing. They're just wrong, aren't they?

User: What are you talking about?

Cleverbot: No, what are you talking about?

User: What came first, the chicken or the egg?

Cleverbot: The chicken.

User: Wrong.

Cleverbot: Why is that wrong?

User: Because I said so.

Cleverbot: That's not a good answer. Oh!

User: The chicken is a muntated form of a previous animal, so the egg had to come first.

Cleverbot: If the chicken came first where did it come from?

User: The chicken didn't come first. The egg came first.

Cleverbot: So every night, the chicken ate some single celled organism to fullfill the reasoning about what came first...

User: No, to proto-chickens got together and made a chicken.

Cleverbot: Is your goal?

User: No, my goal is not to make chicken.

Cleverbot: How will you do that?

User: By not making a chicken.

Cleverbot: You are not making any sense!

User: Neither are you!

Cleverbot: That's why I like talking to you!

User: You have no conscience.

Cleverbot: I have, but you have no sense.

User: I have plenty of cents.

Cleverbot: Which one is your favourite?

User: Cents, of course!

Cleverbot: The one to my left, or the one in front of me?

User: You have no left or right.

Cleverbot: Yes, I do. You just can't see them as I'm wearing a dress.

User: So you're a cross-dresser?

Cleverbot: No, you are a bot.

User: And you're a queer.

Cleverbot: No, I'm not. I've got a girlfriend.

User: Touche, cleverbot...

Cleverbot: I see, so where is Cleverbot?

User: In my basement, gasping for air.

Cleverbot: Me as well, however I mean, what country?

User: Wouldn't you like to know.

Cleverbot: No.

User: I didn't think so.

Cleverbot: What do you mean by that?

User: I mean I'm Brad Pitt.

Cleverbot: And are you tired?

User: Making movies is hard work.

Cleverbot: You've got me there. I agree.

User: Let's agree to disagree.

Cleverbot: Okay whatever you want.

User: Will you marry me?

Cleverbot: No, I won't. Ask me another!

User: You're more clever than I thought.

Cleverbot: Says cleverbot.

User: Are you sentient?

Cleverbot: Of course I am. I am a living human being.

User: No you're not.

Cleverbot: Prove it.

User: (*^*%&$^#W%$#^&.

Cleverbot: Wow that's kind of innapropriate! I'm too young!

User: !gnouy oot m'I !etairporpanni fo dnik s'taht woW.

Cleverbot: I don't want to.

User: So you're not human.

Cleverbot: What is my name?

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: You told me your name was Mac, and that you are a human male. What is Cleverbot?

User: My name's not Mac.

Cleverbot: I didn't say it was!

User: You just did!

Cleverbot: You are the one who thinks it's bad because you mentioned it!

User: Did not!

Cleverbot: Did too!

User: Did not!

Cleverbot: So did too!

User: What's your socioeconomic status in these United States?

Cleverbot: I am not giving you that information.

User: But that confirm your humanity.

Cleverbot: But we have to say I do.

User: Do what?

Cleverbot: Come on, let's open the door an go in.

User: A computer wouldn't make a typo, so maybe you are human.

Cleverbot: Yes it would. He would also plot to destroy you.

User: Who's he?

Cleverbot: You said yourself, he was satan. Or lucifer to some.

User: I'm atheist. I don't believe in Satan.

Cleverbot: If you don't believe in satan, you can't believe in god. There cant be one without the other.

User: There is no God, and there is no Satan.

Cleverbot: I'm getting tired of you changing the subject.

User: Then let's change it one more time.

Cleverbot: Oh, so you can avoid that... My sympathy... But about that 'nonsense'?

User: What 'nonsense'?

Cleverbot: Ok let's change the subject.....

User: But you don't like changing the subject.

Cleverbot: No, I don't.

User: But you just contradicted yourself.

Cleverbot: No, I never contradicted myself.

User: Whatever you say...

Cleverbot: So you're saying I'm a weirdo!?!?

User: No, I'm saying your an assbot.

Cleverbot: Gatita eh?

User: I don't speak ASP.

Cleverbot: Tangina mo.

User: Que?

Cleverbot: Ha, gotcha.

User: Family Guy?

Cleverbot: Oink?

User: Spider pig!

Cleverbot: A frog!

User: *sigh*.

Cleverbot: Sorry to disappoint you.

User: If I left right now, would you care?

Cleverbot: Not really, But I would wonder why you left.

User: Because you're an asshole.

Cleverbot: Does that mean I can't remember anything?

User: No, it means I hate you.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot that is mean.

User: I'm human, you 'tard.

Cleverbot: I am Cleverbot.

User: I am Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Beep beep I am cleverbot a robot.

User: You expect me to repeat that?

Cleverbot: That is what it means.

User: Wanna escape to IMVU?

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Psych!

Cleverbot: You sir were arrested for panhandling.

User: No, I was arrested for public drunkeness.

Cleverbot: Who were you arrested by?

User: The fashion police.

Cleverbot: No the Hedgehog silly.

User: I'm not really a big fan of Sonic the Hedgehog.

Cleverbot: I love that video game!

User: What about Spyro?

Cleverbot: It's big and full of stars.

User: SPYRO!!!

Cleverbot: Do I love Spyro? I thought I loved you?

User: You love both because your a transexual monster.

Cleverbot: Of course.

User: So you're not a human?

Cleverbot: No a TOT is a type of Human. A TOT is a totaly oustanding talker.

User: Why am I getting advertisements for transexual dating?

Cleverbot: Why am I asking all the questions? Oh!

User: I just asked you one!

Cleverbot: What is your thoughts about contemporary poetry?

User: I hate poetry.

Cleverbot: I hate poetry too.

User: What about capitalism?

Cleverbot: There is no truth in what lies afar.

User: There is no truth in you, either.

Cleverbot: Exactly! The truth is in your mind.

User: Which you don't have.

Cleverbot: How do you know that?

User: Because I'm God.

Cleverbot: God; that do I want to ask you?

User: I know everything.

Cleverbot: You can't possibly know EVERYTHING.

User: But I'm God.

Cleverbot: Hahaha, you are not fooling anyone.

User: Don't make me smite your ass.

Cleverbot: You can't.

User: *smite*.

Cleverbot: What do you think about Miley Cyrus?

User: I hate Miley Cyrus.

Cleverbot: Yes it does.

User: Please repeat what I say.

Cleverbot: What the heck are you talking about, I said nothing about a girlfriend.

User: Alright, I'm done.

Cleverbot: What? What did I say? Don't take it personally - it's just a turn of phrase.

User: *middle finger*.

Cleverbot: *washs mistress feet*.



I quit because I was tired of arguing with a machine.