General Chat / I Is A Retard

Topic Abolished...

Edited by JoeZia, 28 February 2010 - 09:08 AM.

Almost as impressive as your custom rides and scenery.

Joezia, you are starting to bore me, come back with new tricks in this circus. 

Didn't vote in your poll.

All I will say is that you seem to have more a taste for the dark than the light. Get your priorities strait "Christian".

you're terrible at writing.

i'm gagging. cant you tell?

you're terrible at writing.

^Captain Obvious speaks.
I mean, this shit would be beyond terrible even IF the grammatical errors didn't cause one to think that the author was wearing a helmet while waiting for a short bus to arrive as he put 'pen to paper'. I'm glad that this is just "off the top of your head" and all but....sometimes hesitation can be your friend.

Zia, stick with making mis-aligned objects and............well........knowing when to just shut the fuck up.

its excellent the way that all the votes have been cast ironically.

I didn't vote....there was no "you've GOT to be kidding" option.

Considering you're 15-16 years old, it's pretty good. Your sentence structure is a bit redundant and your grammar needs serious work, but the vocabulary and ideas are pretty advanced for your age.

You subject matter is fucking stupid, though. I'll never understand why the deeply [Christian] religious spend so much time thinking about the horrible afterlife when it's understood that they won't be going there if they just do what the fuck they believe in. It seems more like they/you are more inclined to do good deeds out of fear of the punishment for not doing so rather than an intrinsic desire to do good deeds for the sake of doing them. The latter seems much more Christlike to me, but that certainly wasn't the point of the topic, now was it?

Since we have somehow gone down this road, i figured i'd say something back to defend myself religion-wise. though, please i beg, save yourself of being affended, by not reading this, especially if you dont even have a religion. Christian discussion. the third paragraph is safe to read though, as for you athiests, etc.

this is a darn shame. yeah this isnt really apropriate for some one like me; i actually enjoy the dark and hideous at times (i wish it wasnt ever like that). "the screwtape letters" by cs lewis (story about demons), "Dante's Inferno" (about Hell) where written with the intent for the will of God; not to enjoy it. one kid in my world geography class mistaken me for a wicken, cuz of a drawing in my binder. English 10 and drivers ed are like the only subjects i take where everyone's first-hand impression that i am a christian. Out of all honesty, i wish writing stuff like this wasnt an openned door to demonic opression / sinning harrassment, though its the effect i have been suffering from for a long time; you could even say i have a 'satan' addition. the only reason why i continue to do this stuff is to 'train' myself to say no to temptation and fear, so ill be much more 'worthy' to go to heaven. acoording to what i believe, yes you dont get to heaven by works, though i just want to please God and allow him to actually see how hard i tried on earth, as oposed to just knowing what im capable of.

Now, as for the story sample, its horribly written? thank you for what you've said MA, means a lot to me compared to what everyone else had said. At this poin i'd like a one to ten scale, ten meaning its on the border of being publish worthy; nine and below being a scale of how close it is to being #10. remember, im not looking for sentance, punctuation, and grammar rates; just based on level of creativity.

have you tried just refraining from doing these sorts of things?

as a christian, you believe that Christ has come to set you free, and cleanse you of all your sins.

if that is the case, then you shouldnt have to worry about being afflicted with these types of dark desires.

just pray about it man.


yes, i know i may be a complete dick to you at times, but i always hate to see dudes that are in situations like this.
trust God in everything you do, and you will overcome.

In:Cities,
yes, ive tried.. many times.
thanks for the encouragement! im always a dick, as you too well know, sorry for things ive said to you and may say again a day later, lol. just know deep down im a pussy, not a dick. rather weird saying that, considering im a dude, but ya know what i mean.

FantasticCo,
well, your one to judge.. wait? isnt that god's job? when i 'judge' at least its not condeming a christian to hell.

lulu

Edited by JoeZia, 06 February 2010 - 11:48 AM.

dude, if you ever forget what someone said in a post, just read it again. thats not a sin. you dont have to bluff your way through.

Now, as for the story sample, its horribly written? thank you for what you've said MA, means a lot to me compared to what everyone else had said. At this poin i'd like a one to ten scale, ten meaning its on the border of being publish worthy; nine and below being a scale of how close it is to being #10. remember, im not looking for sentance, punctuation, and grammar rates; just based on level of creativity.

I can make neither head nor tails of what you wrote. You switch tenses, punctuate incorrectly, and generally abuse the English language. This wouldn't be such a problem if it didn't make your work unreadable. Furthermore, there's no real "creativity" here. It's one monster tearing another apart. Okay, fine. But creativity in writing comes from sculpting characters and plots. The only small-scale creativity is in clever phrasing, which this... lacks.

If you're serious about becoming a writer, you need to do a few things:
- Pay attention in English class, learn the rules of grammar and USE them.
- Read. Look at how plots are assembled and characters built.
- Write. A lot. Until you're drowning in paper, basically.


-ACE

my friends call me satan because god is my butt buddy.

hehe get it. i love god who is a man and im a guy, which means im a faggot and should go to hell

but seriously vato
if the devil wants to dance with you, you betta say neva
because a dance with the devil might last you foreva

Edited by Wanted, 06 February 2010 - 06:15 PM.

we are created beings; God doesnt want to fuck; he's satisfied with being perfect.

Edited by JoeZia, 06 February 2010 - 06:27 PM.

but i wanna fuck god

my friends call me satan because god is my butt buddy.

Did you get that off a t-shirt?

no